Differences of Being Back at Home
A month ago, I made the decision it was time to be back at home with the little guy. It was an extremely tough decision (as it always is) but I'm still feeling like the right one for me. Too many things were pointing in that direction, it was undeniable - I needed a shift. It's been a great, but incredibly draining month (and week, and day, and hour).
At least twice now I've been able to put words to this complete energy dissolvant that is my child. The first time, was a few weeks ago when we were playing around on his little foam mat, he was crawling all over me and accidently kicked me in the nose, hard. It was painful and while not something I'd think to cry over, tears had already made their way out of my eyes. He froze, I pulled it together and realized what an exhausting morning it had already been - it was 9:15AM.
Admittedly, he's been getting up early since we went on a family trip a few weeks ago but it's those double (or triple) pulls when you're not just tired but emotionally, physically or mentally depleted that breaks me down, hopefully - and usually - only for a minute. From there, the energy, innocence and love slowly builds you back up. And that's probably the biggest difference I've been finding with work. No matter the job, for me, when something would be a problem at work and frustrate or annoy me I would carry it around me with me at least for an hour - more often the whole day and into the night - maybe the next day or so if it continued to pop-up in emails or calls. Now, something not so great happens. pause. I get over it. I can't remember one thing Jack did yesterday that annoyed me. There were certainly some and the harder I think mealtime comes into view but his growth and resilience rub off on me and allow me to embrace this wonderful world we're living in together. How lucky am I that I get the time to see it through his eyes? Even if I hear him waking up from a short nap because of his runny nose...praying he'll put himself back down, wonderful what we'll do with the next hour if our plans once again are changed by his whims :)
NEW this week: (21 Months Old)
*Counting up to 15...on a good day
*Thinking about Potty Training...
*Met (& loves) baby cousin rose...and ducklings in boston public garden
